How many times do you let the thoughts you think about yourself keep you from saying, “Yes”?
It’s so simple, this thing called life. It unfolds naturally in a big “Yes”. Life itself is “Yes”! If it were a “No” you wouldn’t even be here.
But we’re so conditioned to saying “No” that most of the time we’re not even conscious that we’re doing it. We complain, we rationalize, we get impatient, we check out, we get angry, we assume the worst, we blame or victimize, we expect, we compare, we shut down.
We’re cranky, grumpy, moody, bitchy, negative, critical, bitter and entitled. All big no-no’s and “No’s” to life.
Mostly it’s our habituated thoughts that create such a negative reaction to things. We’ve been hurt, rejected, denied, penalized, made fun of, shamed and negated. We store those experiences inside us. We make up stories around them. They start to define us and then we come to expect more of the same based on our past hurts. Ultimately, they become preemptive strikes, which then close us out to where we want to go and what we’re trying to make happen in our lives.
Trying to stay open – which is another way of saying “Yes” is hard when most of the things we think about ourselves – or the world at large – are predicated on those habits. So we say “No” to:
1). The moment
2). The possibilities that the world is trying to offer you through the moment
And really – point #3 encompasses the first two. It’s all interconnected. You, yourself are the moment. And you, yourself contain all the possibilities of what you’d like to see happen in your world, in this moment. But when you say “No” to them, there is no access to what you want.
I sometimes realize that it’s a wonder that my life even works half as good as it does in spite of me saying “No” to so many things. What a bummer. If I’d not demand or expect or believe that just because something has been one way for so long that it can’t be anything else. . . If I could just stay open to those spaces within myself that aren’t already preempting the moment by saying “No” to it, what might my life be like?
The beautiful thing about this discovery is that you see that no one is really denying you or saying “No” to you. You’re really doing it to yourself. And because the power then resides within you, you also have the ability to change it.
Such are the constructs of life. They’re your constructs. If you don’t like them, you can deconstruct them and build new ones. Or better yet, don’t build any at all. Just say “Yes”.